I can’t cope

[Captain24]

Sorry @Jynx. You sound like I’m frustrating you. I don’t mean too and I’m really sorry. Please don’t give up on me. I am listening. 

They sound like good bush walking buds. The only things dad has time for is sitting on the lounge reading the newspaper and falling asleep or watching tv shows on catch up for the third time as he keeps falling asleep through them. 

Im sorry for bringing it up. I didn’t mean to stir things. That wasn’t my intention. 

[Jynx]

That was not at all frustration @Captain24 - sounds like you read it in a more negative tone?

It was completely neutral - the use of 'eh' is probably unusual for me though, so perhaps your brain interpreted that as me being frustrated or 'over it'. Which makes sense if you grew up in a home where you needed to be ultra-alert for the tiniest shifts in your parents' emotions. Hypervigilance is rouuuugh! I do totally understand how this sorta thing happens, dw. 

Because actually! In reality, I was trying to demonstrate nonchalance, because I didn't want you to feel pressured! Or feel bad if you didn't feel like engaging in that particular activity. So easy for miscommunications to happen in text! Haha here's me like 'oh no, I don't want captain to feel bad if she's not up for it, better play it cooooool'... Woops, nope, that backfired!! 

So please do NOT think I am giving up on you. Not my style anyway 😋

You are so fine hun, you can go to bed knowing that all is well with us 😁 But I gotta skedaddle haha - nighty night!! 💜 Maybe catcha tomoz!

[Captain24]

T/W SA

Sorry I was stupid enough to read it the wrong way @Jynx Mum says ‘eh’ when she has had enough of whatever I’m saying and wants to dismiss me. So I’m really sorry. Maybe one day I’ll be able to read better. You have reminded me that Ru-bee said to read the message with a positive tone as well as the negative I just assume. See which one fits better and give a different context. I should have done that. I’m sorry. I need to try harder. No wonder I’m in trouble all the time.

I get it now and I’m sorry. It’s hard that you can’t read the tone in a message. I had a rough day (and still feeling it today) He asked if I had ever been SA’d and I had to say yes and describe what happened. It was kinda dismissed as it wasn’t what he was looking for. So it makes me feel like it didn’t matter and wasn’t important. I get that it was irrelevant after I said it. I should have just said no. It brought it all back up again and reminded me that it was my fault. 

Thanks for not giving up on me. Sorry I failed you. I’ll try and do better. 

Just explaining why I took it the way I took it. 

Hope that that is recovery focused. If not let me know where I went wrong and how to fix it. Don’t just ban me please. I really tried.