I can’t cope

[Captain24]

Work wasn’t too bad considering how little sleep I’ve been having. @tyme The run I was on is my favourite and I do it well so that helped a little.

Ive been pushing myself to be busy to distract from my brain. Im not really doing well mentally. Im just trying to mask it on and off her but the mask is slipping. 

Im having trouble sleeping. I slept just over 2 hours on Monday night and had a training day at work yesterday so that was a struggle I barely made 4 hours last night. I’m usually a good sleeper but nothing I’m trying is working. 

The vet gave Pix the all clear! 

[Shaz51]

Great to see 👀 you  @tyme 😊

[tyme]

Thank God Pix got the all clear!

I'm glad you got your favourite run today. I guess work is a distraction and it pays the bills, right?

@Captain24 

Why are you sleeping so little? Because of pain?

[Captain24]

Yeah. It’s a distraction and today was a good distraction. We had a massive storm. The lightning was amazing but it started a fire on the edge of site. It rained that heavily that I struggle to see to drive that big truck! @tyme. We had lightning most of the day! 

Nah. The pain is mostly ok. It hurt a little today but when I took my belt off it wasn’t as bad. I do feel a little sore now but it’s bearable. 

I feel wired all the time but exhausted at the same time. I’m so wired that I can’t slow my brain down enough to sleep. I’m really struggling with it at the moment. I’m feeling wired right now. 

[Captain24]

Sorry.. I should keep it to myself. @tyme. I shouldn’t burden you. 

[tyme]

Nah, you're not burdening me at all! Did I mention that? Sorry if I gave you that impression.

As for the storm today, yikes! The wind was terrible in Vic. I was outdoors when the rain bucketed down! It was intense!

Did you keep working with the storm @Captain24 ?

What's your wind down routine? 

BTW, I still haven't uploaded the photos yet. This afternoon, I put the titanic back together that my nephew dropped. There are some pieces where I don't know where they go, but you can't see that they are missing from the outside... 

[Captain24]

I just feel like I am @tyme. I really want to talk but I know I can’t. 

There is stress and powerlines down all over town. I hope you didn’t get too wet. We have a total fire ban and extreme fire danger. It was only mid thirties today so it’s not even hot yet. 

I have my room temp set, I have the lamp on so the light is soft when I head down there, I’ll have a warm shower, put on white noise, give the dogs a cuddly, snuggle in under my doona and take some deep breaths 

[tyme]

Thank you for describing that @Captain24 . That seems like such an awesome space to be in (I mean the physical environment. Nice and cosy. I'm still sitting at my desk.

I have a box of lego on one side, a sourdough baguette on the other, and three screens propped up in front of me. 

Talk about over stimulating!

Is your house mainly greys and whites?

Mine's white and brown (cabinets and flooring brown)

[Captain24]

I try to make it welcoming so I am able to sleep well but it’s not working right now. @tyme 

Wayyy overstimulating!  I could cope with all those screens. I struggle with just my laptop. 

The baguette sounds good though! 

Yeas the walls are all white except for the green feature tiles in the bathroom’s and laundry. Then a pale green splash back a wood grain grey cupboards in the kitchen. All the furniture is grey. 

[tyme]

I'm trying to imagine the green. I'm imagining a dark mossy green... I'm wrong, aren't I? @Captain24 

Will you be around tomorrow? 

I'll be on later in the evening around 8pm.