I can’t cope

[rav3n]

hey @Captain24!

firstly - WELL DONE for attending!! that takes a lot of guts and i'm really glad you gave it a go. totally okay if it's not really your thing, maybe after the second session you'll know for sure if you want to continue it or not? 

ahh i see, so there is a bit of structure around this support group - which can be good too. and even if you didn't share, sitting and being a listening ear for others is great too. maybe you'll feel a bit less alone hearing other people's stories, or perhaps, they'll appreciate you sitting with their feelings and listening.

about the facilitator - is she asking for 1-on-1 catch ups? totally understand if you're not ready for catch ups, and i reckon if you let the support group facilitator know that you're not ready for that yet, she'll understand too. i get the feeling that maybe she's asking to catch up to give you an opportunity to share a bit about yourself in a more 'relaxed' setting since the group space can be quite overwhelming? but i absolutely hear how small talk can be uncomfy, it stresses me out too. if there's any phrases you'd like some help understanding, feel free to share... although i'm not sure if i'll be super helpful as i tend to overanalyse sometimes 😅

[Captain24]

There wasn’t really any sharing. @rav3n. It’s all about the book. It’s all about the 12 steps, the readings in the book, the phrases and then that ask people what they think the phrases mean. Everyone has to ask someone else about a different phrase. There was twice in the whole night where it was asked if someone had a problem they wanted to share. I actually know nothing about anyone. 

I didn’t buy the book so I don’t have any of the phrases. It’s really weird. The concept is called ‘Grow’ it’s nation wide. 

[Captain24]

I’ve been feeling really good lately. But this afternoon I’m starting to struggle. Im feeling really lost. Really unsure of myself. Really uneasy. Really sad. Really low. No energy. 

[rav3n]

@Captain24 oh! okay that's different to what i had expected, i guess this support group is more about learning/psychoeducation than speaking on lived experience? it still sounds like an interesting group to attend, do you reckon it's something you want to keep trying? or were you hoping it was more about sharing lived experience and validating/uplifting each other?

sorry to hear that this afternoon's been a bit more difficult Cap. do you know why you've felt a sudden drop in mood and energy? any thoughts on what could be helpful with boosting it back up even by 1%?

[Captain24]

I was expecting the whole support thing like you said. Not everyone reading out loud from a book and saying some sections together like church. @rav3n.

Im just waiting to get paid so I can go grocery shopping. I’ve done everything on my lists for the last 3 days except the stuff I need money for. So it’s not as though I haven’t achieved anything. 

I don’t know what the drop is. I’ve taken my afternoon meds and should be feeling ok. I’ve done some Lego today and I’m watching tv so I’ve done self care. I feel like I have done everything right. 

[rav3n]

yeah that's fair, it does give off a study group vibe @Captain24 

do you reckon you're feeling a bit anxious about awaiting the payment? 

or perhaps there's no specific reason. there are times where our mood and body might just feel heavy and need bit of a rest to recover/re-energise, and that's okay too. doesn't mean you've done anything 'wrong', i guess that's just apart of being human maybe? the important part is that you're working on taking care of yourself (which you are actively doing!)

[Captain24]

Yeah. It’s weird @rav3n 

My pay came through and I’ve just done my shopping. Now all I have to do is cook dinner as meals are ready for work. 

I really don’t know what it is. It just keeps spiralling lower and lower. Maybe I’ll try another Lego kit. I dont know what else to do 

[tyme]

Hello @Captain24 ,

Great lego projects there! Love em!

Tonight, another kid down with gastro... both ends gastro... ewww...

Unfortunately, it was a flop of a day. I had so much going on. So I didn't get a single task done... not a single one! But I'm feeling a little eww tooo.

Oh, I'm off tomorrow, so I wont see you until maybe Sunday. Actually, aren't you working tomorrow? After tomorrow, I'll share with you where I went.

What are you doing tomorrow?

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

It kept me distracted after I had done everything on my list that I could until I got paid. I needed help today especially this afternoon and even more now. 

Oh no.. It was only recently that they were sick. That’s school for ya! I hope it’s short lived and they are well soon. I hope you’re not getting sick again. 

It’s not a flop! If you had other things to do then that’s what needed to be done. Just a different priority today. I’ve been reading up a lot about adhd and ASD. Lots of people use lists to keep their mind in order. A lot of the time that have several things on the go and nothing completed. But it helps with remembering everything. I thought of you! 

Yeah. I’m on dayshift for the next 3 days so I won’t be around until I get home at 8. 

Oh.. I’m interested to know. Sunday after 8 it is. We have a date! 😜 

[tyme]

SAVE THE DATE! 

I'll see you after 8pm on Sunday 🙂 @Captain24 

I don't know what I'll do tomorrow because my stomach doesn't feel too good.

And yes! Sticky notes, and lists are TOTALLY ME! I can't cope without them or I go round and round and get nothing done!