Lived Experience Forum

[Jynx]

@Captain24 hmm yeah maybe it's worth a conversation with your CM about this feeling of letting her down/failing her if you don't meet expectations? Like if this feeling can make it harder because of the pressure and stuff like that, she may not even realise. See if there's some way she can ensure she's still encouraging/motivating and pushing you when the time is right and that's what you need, but also maybe ease off a little, and perhaps provide some reassurance to you around these feelings of failure.

Today can be a write off! Instead of mulling over the crappiness of today, perhaps reflect on the goodness from yesterday, and hold onto hope that another day like that is just around the corner!

Yeah society has some pretty bogus ideas.... Like that being needy or selfish is automatically a bad thing, or that being proud of ourselves and indulging in life's pleasures is a sin? So backwards... and yet I can only imagine the millions of people who have suffered for these lousy concepts... Okay, better stop there or I'll get into a big rant and be all irritable and cranky when I knock off 🤣

Tomorrow is housework day for me as well! I have a mountain of dishes I've been ignoring and really need to vaccuum. Plus Razz has had the runs so I need to go to the pet store and get all new bags of litter despite JUST having bought some. Ach, the things we do for our fuzzy friends! Hope your cleaning day goes swimmingly, and the puppy baths don't result in too much wet-dog-chaos!!

Oh gosh, yeah hope it's just a possum or something!! Stay safe, stay warm, and keep being your wonderful self! (and no, Captain's brain, I will NOT accept any of the protests you might have to that fact! 😜). Nighty night darlin 😊💜

[Snowie]

Good morning @Captain24 

Wishing you a good day today 💕

[Captain24]

So I e had a very upsetting phone conversation. 

My brother sent my mum a msg yesterday say we were getting a new family member. Mum instantly thought his girlfriend was pregnant. She isn’t, they are getting a dog. 

My mum said. That’s good as she shouldn’t  have kids anyway as she has some sort of mental problem and has to take medication for the rest of her life. I asked her what. She said she doesn’t know with it’s depression, schizophrenia, bipolar or something. Just that is some mental problem. I said that it’s called a mental illness. Just got a humph in response. 

She was so dismissive, rude and unaccepting. I don’t know how many times she said ‘mental problem’ Is that what she thinks of me? Am I just some mental case? Am I not worthy of being a normal functioning person? I feel ashamed of my MI. I am now wondering if that’s what everyone else thinks of me. 

Sorry. It just hit really hard. It hurts a lot. I am ashamed of who I am. 

[RiverSeal]

Hey @Captain24, sorry to hear that you are feeling like this and going through this with your mother.

Our family members can say some unhelpful things about MH at times and can show a lack of understanding and be unsupportive. This can reflect the broader community, and it's not nice to experience it. I can understand that it does not sit well with you, particularly coming from your mum.

At times like this, it can be helpful for us to focus on what we can control vs what we can't control. We can't control what other people think, say, and behave but we can control how we react. Easier said than done and when we are feeling emotional it can be challenging to separate our thoughts. I encourage you to give it a go and maybe try to distance yourself from the comments.

What do you think about this @Captain24, do you think it might work for you in this situation?

Sitting with you today and acknowledging how hard this is to hear from a loved one.

Take care

RiverSeal 

[Captain24]

Thanks @RiverSeal 

Ive done housework, bathed one dog and had a shower. All with music going.

It’s hard to unhear what was said. I know I chose how to react to it and I should be able to get over it, it’s different coming from your mum. I know that she doesn’t believe in my illness and never will. I know that’s what she thinks but to hear it… hurts. 

She never has a nice thing to say about me so I should totally be use to it. I know I’m not good enough in her eyes and never will be. I shouldn’t have expected anything better to come out of her mouth. 

[RiverSeal]

I get it @Captain24 and it has happened to me too and it's not nice. Stay strong and connected with the community here where you are valued and respected! RiverSeal 

[Bow]

Hey @Captain24  heaps sorry your mums words have had such a huge impact on you today. Leaving some squishy hugs for you 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

[Captain24]

Thanks @Bow @RiverSeal.

I know that’s what she says and does. Thanks for the good thoughts 

[tyme]

Hey @Bow @Captain24 @Snowie 🙂

My house is a LOUD chaotic mess...

Kids are playing 3 legged races. There's screaming everywhere. And just NOISE.

Is this what I have to look forward to all weekend???

@Captain24 , I hear your mum said some harmful things today... it just shows there's limited understanding....

[Captain24]

I wouldn’t cope.. I don’t like noise. @tyme. I have enough trouble with barking dogs.

At least while they a screaming good screams they are having fun, being together, being creative and not on devices! 

Positive spin for you. 2 days down.  14 to go!! 😜 

Yea.. mums a bitch and I should know not to expect anything else. There is no understanding or want to understand.