Partners who chose to stay for the long haul

[Former-Member]

Living and loving someone with MI presents relationship challenges and often others cannot see why we chose to stay with our partners.  

Being mindful of not intruding on others stories  I thought having a thread where we can share tips and encourage one another would be of value.

[Former-Member]

@LizzieLou come and meet some others who care for their partners

@Shaz51 @Determined @Sophie1 @Raine @PeppiPatty @Maryjune 

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member

Great thread topic.  I've subscribed to it so I dont miss any tips or encouragement offered here.  If I come up with anything useful to others, I will of course post it here too.

Thanks,

Sherry 💜

[Shaz51]

good morning @Former-Member, @Former-Member

[Former-Member]

Hi @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Determined how are things going?

[Determined]

In survival mode atm @Former-Member

No real reason or drama just my copeing ability more than a little frayed atm... 

We do have bro in law staying for the weekend... adds dual meaning to the concept of long weekend lol... 

Great idea for a thread btw. It is a good thing to reflect on at times like this. (For me anyway). 

As you would be well aware it requires more than a little commitment and for me sometimes blind determination not to give up.  

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member. Not the best. 😥 So difficult dealing with a hubby who has been seriously sick for over a year now.  He is physically sick, feeling vulnerable and losing control of his own mind, body and life. For a very controlling person, it must be a really difficult transition for him. Little wonder he is deeply depressed, angry and volatile. His son is visiting this weekend too, and I think it is bringing home to him just how much he has gone downhill since he last saw him 2 years ago. That was the last time hubby was well enough for us  to travel the 6 hr trip to visit him and his young family.  Its tough dealing with his very understandable moods and feelings of frustration. I dont know why he has to take it out on me though. Its not my fault. 😞

Sherry

[Former-Member]

Yikes @Determined, I guess the outlaws will want to visit as much as they are able.  Hope you manage to get in some enjoyable family time. 

@Former-Member No, it is not our fault. 

No, it is not fair and not acceptable that people take things out on the ones closest to them.  None of at our best when unwell, and I think as long term carers we separate the person from the illness and learn how to manage the things we can do something about. However, it is up to each of us as to draw a line in the sand as to what we see is acceptable or not and what we should do if that line is crossed.  Sometimes setting and enforcing boundaries can make a difference. This is something your therapist might be able to help you with. 

[Former-Member]

Hi @Roslyncicely

How are you going?

[Determined]

LoL @Former-Member

This outlaw only comes when there is something in it for him.  Mum is still with us and he is already seeing what he can grab.

Feeling a bit angry and sulky about it at the moment. Just have to smile and be polite though.