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Looking after ourselves

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I wish I hadn't woken up this morning. I don't want to deal with this pain anymore. 

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

It's like they're picking on me... because i have not succumb to their ways... and i can only laugh and call it a game for so long before i admit my defeat and become converted... but i do not want to give up until the very end for i have seen the fate of those who went before me... and i have seen what they've become...

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I want to do a runner. I want to run away. I am sick of being trapped by my meds and doctors appointments. Life is too short to be trapped by the medications which are perscribed by doctors who just want to make you normal to fit in a a bankrupt evil society. I am so sick of being spoon fed by governments that just want to control you. If I could find a way to escape I would I just dont know how ....

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I’m worried I’m going to lose everything if I wind up in hospital again. Even worse, I’m worried I’m fighting and losing against everything. I’ve got far too much on nowadays to comprehend!

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

Full of all kinds of worry now 🙁

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

Maybe it was the wrong decision. I dont know anymore.

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I feel weird. It's been a day of feeling like I'm seeing everything but not part of much. I've tripped myself over wondering if I was imagining things or if I had said or heard or seen what I did. I tried to ask for help but I don't think it was heard or maybe I was asking the wrong people or the wrong thing. The temptation to turn to unhelpful ways to get through has been high and I don't like that much at all. I need sleep.

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I had been feeling a lot better symptom wise and am starting to function better since my last big break out.  Thankfully my daughter who is supportive and me for her issues is taking a break away.  I really love her but having to hold it together to support her can be hard when i dont feel strong.  I also found out my brother has cancer recently and i think that was just too much along with the day to day stuff for myself.

I am realizing after visiting my brother recently that i dont want to play the family games anymore it really does my head in.  I want to support him in his journey but i think i want to do it at a distance.  I am sick of being kicked around and blamed when the sun doesnt shine (thats how it seems).  Face to face just becomes a battleground and i cant do it anymore.  I am not the person they think they know and i struggle to maintain their perception since i keep my Did secret.  Only my ex and my kids are aware.

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

I’m worried I’ll crack again. Can’t seem to grab traction. So much SI at night. My brain is breaking down bit by bit. I’m scared of the breaking point. 

Re: Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

A massage is something essential, that helps with my back pain.

It's also the only human touch (apart from a hand-shake), that I can get.

Yet it's expensive, I'm not earning enough to cover any extra expenses (or to cover regular bills).

So the expense causes me stress.

Then people said to me "You're lucky to have had a massage" - What? It's essential to ease my back pain, I paid a lot of $$ for it (which I do not have spare).

That has nothing to do with luck - it's "Self-Care" at a high cost....

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